See, Mr. Lawler, you don't have any brains

"Metallica lyrics?" you ask. "I don't come to this site for Metallica references."

And to that I say, "Please don't tell them about that last post because they're not very nice and they like to bully nobodies like me with their lawyers and James Hetfield crunches and gargles with human bones to keep his voice rough and gruff and I need my bones to keep my organs from collapsing on themselves and making me look all melty and the unrelated video below is pure genius and after all these years still makes me laugh in that way that I do where it's all muted and you don't think I think something's funny but I'm just not a good laugher and I don't laugh much unless really really stoned but I've given that up because I think it gives me heart palpitations and in fact don't tell Metallica anything I've said here."