Finally, a funny shoe. Because the comic strip Shoe sucks male sex organ

So how 'bout that President Bush? Eh?... Eh?

Did ya hear this? Did ya read about this? Seems that an Iraqi journalist threw his shoes at the lame-duck leader of the free world. Talk about [insert jokey joke joke here]!!!

But seriously, it gives a whole new meaning to [hilarious shoe-related pun, ha ha ha]. This guy knows what I'm talking about. It's like if [famous douchebag] had a baby with [B-list has-been hack]. I wonder what that baby would sound like. I bet it would sound a little something like this: WAAAAAAA WAAAAAA WAAAAAAA!!!! See... because it's a baby.

Thank you. You've been a great audience.


I cribbed that bit from that one dude who makes with the laugh-laugh. But for reals, I'm astounded by Bush's reflexes. The cushy life ain't slowed him down none, no how. All these years of dumbass decisions and treasonous behavior, and then it turns out we got a ninja for a president. He shoulda fought the war in Iraq himself. He coulda made that Matrix bullet-dodging shit cool again.

But on a personal note, the unsung story of this, uh, story is the accuracy of the shoe throws by the Iraqi. It's personal because I don't think I could come that close to a target like he did, even at close range. A baseball is hard enough for me to throw without looking silly, but a shoe? And two shoes in rapid succession? That can be wildly unpredictable. What if a shoelace catches on my finger at the last second? The shoe could whip around and kick me in the crotch. Or hit an innocent bystander. Or maybe I'd leave a motherfucking footprint right on the forehead of the Great Satan himself. Ohhh snap!

But I wouldn't bet on that.